As we embark upon sweetheart's day, I'd like to just issue a word of caution to the ladies out there reading this. I'm sure that February 15th will bring with it broken hearted women who find out they are not in the place of estate they thought they should be with a certain gentleman in their lives. Most single but dating men dread this day, while myriads of women swoon over the thought of some man showing out so they can have something to brag to their friends about. Problem is, do you really know where you stand with him? There are lots of ladies out there who are in relationships with men who are only dating them. He's not being a dog either, he is simply being a man, and the wires are crossed because what he calls dating, you have already labeled a relationship. Be very careful. Let's first break down what dating is: the art of dating is quality time spent with another person with the efforts of getting to know them better. For most men courtship is an ultimate goal, but not always immediately. (We'll talk about why in a second) This is the problem, and is exactly how wires get crossed and messages mixed. Ladies we project two different things when we date. Women's projections are mostly always futuristic. His projections are in the moment. He is not thinking most times, "Ewwww this is wifey," while on the contrary you are thinking, "he'd make a great husband." His mind is on the moment, and you have taken him away from his world, and there is no greater drug for a man than to have a woman make such a lasting memory (not always sexual) that it makes him forget about the tasks he has to do outside of getting to know you. THIS ladies is how we fall in love. When you have the ability to take us away from our worlds. Until a man has THAT moment with you, he is going to be cool with just "kickin it." Now, if this is a ride you don't want to take, simply speak up and ask the right questions. If he is serious, he will oblige. If he is not, love yourself enough to bounce. Know that men actually love in their heads and not their hearts, and I am speaking of the head above the shoulders. Love is practical for us. The practicality of it is what gives us the feeling. The cornerstone for us is "is she ride or die." This is why we are not mushy at first. We are sizing you up. Thus, this is why men DATE. We are looking for our ride or die. So all this to say, if you want to be Bae, collapse the game and take him away from his world by being the phenomenal woman that you are. If you don't you'll be banished to "Boodom." Guard your hearts out there.

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